Data is objective

Sorry there haven’t been any posts recently folks.  I’m getting ready to move back to Cleveland, and simultaneously wading through all the bureaucracy related to getting into graduate school.  So, pretty busy.  I’m fully aware that that was a sentence fragment, and I don’t care, cause I’m a renegade.

Before I get to the actual point, I should mention that I’m celibate.  That’s right people, 25 years old, still a virgin.  Since symbols are important, I wear a ring that I call my “celibacy ring”.  I used to call it my promise ring, but that’s a little too teenage girl, and then I called it my “I don’t bang ladies” ring, but that led to a little confusion re: banging dudes, so yeah, celibacy ring.  So I was at work, and one of my co-workers asked if I was married, I said no, conversation ensued, the end result of which was her asking “How do you do that, I could never do that.”  Now, note that she had never actually tried, but was still entirely certain that there was no way she could pull it off.  This conversation got me thinking, about a few things actually.

Point first:  When people find out that I’m celibate, pretty much everyone that voices an opinion says something to the effect of “Wow, that’s really cool.  I wish I had done that,” or “Man, I bet that saves you lots of hassle/makes your life simpler/ etc . . .”  To which I reply, “Well, yeah.”  So, here’s the bit that I don’t understand: pretty much everyone is on board that celibacy is a pretty good idea, but almost no one actually does it.

Ok, cultural repercussions of the 60’s and 70’s, I get it.  I can even admire the spirit that say, “This is the way it’s always been done, but maybe that isn’t the best way.  Maybe free love is the ticket.”  Now I don’t agree with it, but there was identification of a problem, and a theory that proposed a different mode of interaction that just might be better.  It has been, however, 30-40 years people.  The experiment has failed.  Free love, as noble as its intentions may, or may not, have been, has given us “Girls Gone Wild”.  We have been shell-gamed friends, by some sort of quick-handed metaphysical carny wizard.

Point Second:  Admitting to a character trait does not therefore give you license to indulge that trait.  Saying “I’m just a bitchy person” does not give you the right to be a bitch.  We identify character flaws to overcome them, not revel in them.

Side note: I’m listening to The Police, and they rule.

That’s it from me.  Questions and comments, thinkers, questions and comments.

A note to my coworkers:

This is a book:

Books generally have two covers, one on the front, and one on the back. Between those covers, there are papers with words on them, and those are called pages. Sometimes, books can have lots of ads, pictures, floppy covers, and are printed once a month. Those are called magazines.

 No I have not seen last night’s “American Idol”. No I haven’t seen the new “So You Think You Can Dance.” I could give two craps who the new bachelor is going to pick.

 Thank you for your time.

 -Greg

Titles are bourgeois

Just kidding.  I don’t have much today, but I beg your indulgence re: a literary geek-out.   The following piece is by Gerard Manley Hopkins, and it bears consideration.  Note: it’s better if you read it out loud (don’t worry, no one will make fun of you).

Spring and Fall, to a Young Child

Margaret, are you grieving,
Over Goldengrove unleaving?
Leaves, like the things of man, you
With your fresh thoughts care for, can you?
Ah! as the heart grows older
It will come to such sights colder
By and by, nor spare a sigh
Though worlds of wanwood leafmeal lie;
And yet you will weep and know why.
Now no matter, child, the name:
Sorrow’s springs are the same.
Nor mouth had, no nor mind, expressed
What heart heard of, ghost guessed:
It is the blight man was born for,
It is Margaret you mourn for.

Gets me every time.

Signs Of The Times #2 Voluntary Vasectomy

  An old friend of mine from college recently posted this blog on his myspace profile. He has voluntarilly gotten a Vasectomy. Not for science, but for a list of reasons you can read about if you jump to his blog. Here is reason #6:“There are already way too many people having kids. so obviously, shouldn’t we be HOPING that more people choose NOT to? shouldn’t we be cheering them on?! shouldn’t all you people WITH kids, be glad that theres people like me and others willing to help offer a tad bit of counter-balance to your procreation? if the grown of population slows, or even decreases, the better chance you kids have of an environment thats not totally raped. be happy, i’m helping out your future kids.” Although his argument is very interesting, something about this doesn’t seem right to a lot of people. What do you think?

Talk is cheap, and apparently, so is music.

“Sarah and me, we had so much fun together-
I’ll remember you forever, Sarah and me.”

Bloghearald.com says that there are over 70 MILLION blogs on the internet.

“Pretty Pretty, won’t you smile-
I’m the best in my game.
First I look you in the eye-
Then I shy away.”

That means that GBTU is a drop… in a very, very large bucket. What makes something worth listening to? Why should we pay attention to anyone?

Does the cheapening of words drive us to search for older, more proven, divine words? Are you sick of all the chatter? I am. I’m tired of second-rate poetry sung to even worse musical accompaniment. The blog worlds, and ultimately the musical world, will burn itself out. What will be left standing in the ashes?

God, His Word, and the Church. If we know it, we’ll have something to say- and that something will be worth hearing.

Follow me here . . .

So, archetypes. I’ve been thinking about them because of this book I’ve been reading by Northrop Frye, the guy who invented Archetypal Literary Theory. Have I mentioned I was an English major? If not, hey, I was an English major. The quick idea of the theory is this: there are certain patterns and symbols that seem to be hardwired into our psyches, and those things resonate so deeply with us they mean the same things in all cultures. For example: water means purity, mountains mean grandeur and strength, and so on and so forth. Carl Jung sort of invented the idea of the archetype, and applied it to psychology, a guy name Joseph Campbell wrote about archetypes in anthropology, Frye did it with literature. Wikipedia actually has a pretty decent article on the subject.

Here’s the point: when we think about God, we plug in various archetypes because that’s what makes sense to us.  God is like a mountain, because mountains are majestic.  God is like water, because water is pure and refreshing.  I think it makes more sense to flip that script (warning: I may be to white to have used that phrase).  God isn’t like water, water is like God.  Archetypes make sense because they’re designed to make sense.

I wish I could take credit for the idea, but it’s still pretty cool to think about.

Lightweight Prophecy #1

GBTU thinks these things are going to end up in an action movie (soon). Seriously. How could movie directors have missed this one? Apparently this is the only German MINENRAUMER in captivity, taken by the russians after WWII.

But more importantly… 

 Why have I not seen Indiana Jones driving one of these things right through the Nazi camp? Maybe these Alkett VsKfz 617 MINENRAUMER’S (MINENRAUMER’S!?!?! EVEN THE NAME IS COOL!) have have apparently flown under the radar. See more here and here.

 One more, another weird one.

Dante is so money

 

So, the other day I was watching Comedy Central (like you do) and there was a guy doing stand-up.  I don’t recall his name, but he had rheumatoid arthritis, so you can look it up on the off chance that you feel really passionate about it.  Anyways, he told this story about his confirmation, and how the first “adult” decision he made was to never go back to church.  This got a laugh from the crowd, but they really lost it when he further speculated that “hell is probably ok”  and that he wouldn’t mind going.  Keep in mind people: Hell.  The crowd was cheering and clapping.

This, naturally, reminds me of Dante’s Inferno.  If you haven’t read it, I (along with everyone else who has an opinion on such things) recommend it highly.  The opening sequence, as Dante is going into Hell, is a picture of people literally climbing over each other trying to get in.  Dante’s point here is that God doesn’t send anyone to Hell, that we as people will run screaming straight into Hell, if only it means that we don’t have to listen to God.  It should be noted that Dante wrote this 700 years ago.  We have, apparently, made zero progress.

You’ve probobly seen the puppy-tossing video by now…

It’s a dog.

 Yes, it was wrong for him to do that, it was cruel. It was unacceptable.

According to Jezabel.com:

“You have probably seen (or possibly chosen to avoid seeing) the video of the 22-year–old Marine throwing the fluffy white puppy off a cliff. It was apparently shot in Haditha, Iraq, the site of that famous 2005 massacre of noncombatant civilians, and the news follows on the heels of that other great YouTube video of a bunch of British teenagers gang-raping a neighborhood single mom. The puppy is small and adorable and lifeless and white, so at the very least it did not fall victim to doggie discrimination, but naturally, predictably, some bloggers are wondering what all the outrage means — the Marine’s name has been posted and his family harassed, Lori Drew-like, on the internet — about the rationale of human compassion.

It is true: a dog is not a person. A dog has no dreams or aspirations or prejudices or hates or real future. A dog is simply an amiable species of animal on which we humans choose to project all the good and kind and unprejudicial characteristics we wish were not so scarce in humans. At least, I assume that is why we post all those pictures of them all the time. If you choose to reject and/or denounce these characteristics as irrational or unproductive, as the refuge of the suckers and the weak and the easily manipulable, well, I hope your obsessive self-documentation of that bold new philosophy at least hastens the process by which you realize what an idiot you are, dude.”

GBTU adds:

We only love cute animals. Puppies- better not throw them. Snakes? Toss away. You’ve heard the joke before: “Dolphin-free Tuna? WHAT ABOUT THE TUNA?” We don’t care about Tuna… why? Because they’re ugly, and they’re tasty. When I spent time in Nicaragua, dogs were overgrown rats, and were considered as such. To keep one as a pet was especially disgusting to the people that live there.

 But why the hell would you post this soldier’s address? That’s TOTALLY messed up. Are you wishing harm on this man, or his family? Do you have any idea of the atrocities he has seen? Could there be a small possibility that this guy has some major issues? To wish harm on him or his family is EVIL. Hurting this man or his family is an entirely sane response to this.

Holy Moses- God will strike you down if you don’t vote for Obama.

From my friend Andy:

 ”Sometime last year I started recieving unsolicited e-mails from the Ohio Democratic party. Someone must have signed all the 707 staff up for them because we’ve all recieved them throughout the year, but this one is just insulting to us as Christ followers. Here’s some of the text…”

Dear Fellow Ohioans,

Once again God’s children are faced with a historic choice—the wilderness of doubt and fear or the promised land of faith and hope.

Long ago, after years of wandering in the wilderness, the nation of Israel stood on the threshold of the Promised Land. And the twelve scouts they had sent ahead all agreed that it represented a desirable future.

Ten of them, however, were more focused on the problems than the possibilities. “The people are fearsome. The towns are fortified. Better stick with the status quo.”

The other two, Joshua and Caleb, were fired up and ready to go. They, too, noticed the obstacles but had the faith to see beyond them. Unfortunately, however, the people listened to the naysayers. And no one from that generation entered the Promised Land.

Our nation, as well, stands on the threshold of promise. The obstacles we face are issues like health care and the environment, economic justice and peace. And that most sinister enemy of all, the voice of doubt and fear: “Be realistic. Don’t fall for that Promised Land hype. Fear the future. Fall back on the familiar.”

To which God replies, as he always has, with the words, “Be not afraid.” And one leader, Barack Obama, is listening. Barack Obama calls us to denounce this faithless chorus of “No we can’t.” And unites us to possess the promise of “Yes, we can!”

That is why we, like Joshua and Caleb before us, are embracing the message of faith, hope and change.

Sincerely,
Rev. Joel King                                                            
(Cousin of Martin Luther King, Jr.)
Executive Secretary
Ohio Baptist General Convention* 

Rev. Tim Ahrens
Senior Pastor
First Congregational Church (Columbus) 

*Church affiliations for identification purposes only

Read the story from him here.